Tips to Celebrate without Financial Stress!
You have your wedding party selected and they all said, “Yes!” Great! Being asked is an honor and can be a lot of fun. However, it’s no secret that being in a wedding party can come with some expenses. Below are some tips on how to celebrate with your closest friends without asking them to take out a loan!
Attire
Finding that perfect dress or suit doesn’t need to break the bank. Luckily, there are affordable choices online for your wedding party. And while choosing the color is hard online, many places offer free fabric swatches. Check out Kennedy Blue. They offer a great at-home, try-on process for very little cost. Also, check where you bought the bride’s dress(es) or the groom’s suit(s). They might offer a discount if the wedding party also purchases from them.
Bridal/Couple Showers
I was talking with a friend recently who is a bridesmaid for a friend’s wedding. The sister of the bride was hosting a bridal shower. This was not a personal shower or a bachelorette party/shower. This was a shower where they were inviting relatives and family friends. The sister sent out a list of food and decorations to the entire bridal party, expecting them to help with the shower. What? Here is my take on showers. If you plan on hosting and do not ask for co-hosts, then you take on the cost and planning for it. The purpose of the wedding party is to support the couple on the wedding day, not to fund all the pre-wedding activities. The personal shower and/or bachelor(ette) parties are usually costly enough!
I also think it is optional that the wedding party be at all the showers. This can get very expensive if the expectation is to bring a gift to every shower. Let your wedding party know that you do not expect them to attend, even if they are invited. And if they do attend, tell them to bring a card with the gift written inside and use the same gift for each shower.
Bachelor(ette) Parties
Warning, this is my next soapbox rant. Ok, maybe not a full rant but very strong opinions! I’m sure I’ll be showing my age, but when did bachelor and bachelorette parties become so extra? Vegas? Nashville? Napa? New York? Atlantic City? The expectation and expenses are becoming a bit much. This is asking a lot of your wedding party to spend the money and vacation time when they might not have that luxury. If you really want to go to these places, how about planning them for your honeymoon?
Another future maid-of-honor told me a story about how they planned the bachelorette party at a vacation spot about 1 hour out of town where there were fun bars, restaurants, and tubing down the river. They booked a cabin for an overnight stay and they planned all the food, beverages, games, etc. Then the bride heard that the groom’s wedding party was taking him to Nashville. The bride called the maid-of-honor crying and saying it wasn’t fair that he was going to Nashville and they were just going someplace local. Please; don’t be this bride. In all honesty, the wedding party really doesn’t need to plan anything! Be thankful and grateful for what they have planned and enjoy it.
Gifts
Most couples give their attendants gifts for being part of their wedding party. Consider giving them something a bit more practical than a t-shirt that says “bridesmaid” or a glass with their initials and date etched on it. Things like:
- A gift certificate to the salon where they will be getting their hair, makeup and/or nails done
- Pay for part of their tuxedo rental
- Pay for part of their hotel room
- A gas card if they are traveling by car a long distance
You can always add a little bit of fun to the gift with candy, food, or a bottle of wine.
Travel and Accommodations
If the wedding party is a tight-knit friend group, consider looking for an Airbnb or VRBO. They tend to be a bit less expensive per night once it’s divided out amongst everyone.
Hair and Makeup
Give your attendants the option to do their own hair and makeup. This can get very costly and if they are comfortable doing it themselves, let them! After all, everyone will be looking at the couple anyway.
Time Off from Work
Remember, more than likely, your wedding party will be taking time off of work for all the events for your big day. Be cognizant of that and try to respect their time. Be understanding if they can’t take a day off to attend a shower or might get to the bachelor(ette) party until later than everyone else.
While everyone you ask will be honored to be up in the front with you on one of the most important days of your life, remember to respect them and honor them in return.
Remember, less is more
~ Melissa
